A Trajectory – Artistic Endeavors

The aim of the game is to get to work; rain, hail or shine.  

I had come up with the title This is Philanthropy and I knew where I was going.  The only thing I was missing was the mentality of a pro artist.  I had been creating art my whole life by this point.  From a 10 year old kid obsessed with world flags to a 27 year old who just moved to Cambodia, partly to pursue an artistic endeavor.  

Before leaving Siem Reap to go live rural, I recall learning some invaluable lessons from some of the great writers and academics today.  As far as setting up the context and setting, I had that down pad.  I was moving out to rural Cambodia where I was going to experience a certain level of isolation and loneliness.  

These conditions are necessary, despite the fact that they can be detrimental to your health if overdone.  However, I knew this was the number one opportunity to double down on my learning and some deep, grinding work.  

Its not all pretty, however.  Some of the most gut wrenching moments are had when you come across obstacles that stand in the way of you putting work out.  There is a level of embarrassment that comes, as well.  I often cringe at old videos and pieces of writing.

I am still overcoming many obstacles, like perfectionism and many of the others obstacles that come like chronic procrastination. These things can be extremely painful, emotionally and mentally. I have experienced chronic amounts of procrastination without even realising what I am doing. It took me reading a book on art to recognise the fact that some of the problems I had surrounding anxiety and stress levels had to do with my lack of creating and my fears around putting work out there.

Now days, things seem a little easier in terms of writing. It feels more natural and I have more confidence in what I am saying because now I have lived more of this experience and I have put in a lot of hours, even when that was the last thing I wanted to do. Its been tough and the challenge will never end. That’s the whole aim of the game, however.

This isn’t about playing in finite terms. There is no destination in this journey, rather it is a trajectory that can go as far as you want to take it.